--no lie, sometimes I...

Want to be in love so I could write one of those songs or poems. You know those kinds...

cup of `TEA.

Sitting here with a hot cup of tea...

He gives me reason
To feed in--
to this feeling he gave me.
How he discreetly managed to have me fall into that ditch
You know... that ditch of love.

So here's my cup.
Take it before it overfloweth.
For just 1 spilled drop, he would surely take notice.
The way he noted: SPILLED CONTENT IS THE BEST MESS TO CLEAN--
Simply means you had THAT much love for me.
This is my cup of tea, and love it is indeed.

So stir...
Stir with your strong, calloused hands...
Stir emotions to quell the fire in my soul.
See if you can have me in moments both hot and cold.
Different degrees of my tea for your tongue to enjoy.

So enjoy.

But don't forget to add a few sugar packets.
At times, I'm not so sweet;
I come with a couple of bad habits.
But my cup sits, awaiting your claim.
Go and have at it.

I come with a cup of tea, and wanted you to have it.

Hm...

"...if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?"

--Ecclesiastes 4:11

     Maybe a soulmate is designed for each person on this earth.

freshout thee stove; HEAT. -- 10.28

NEW MUSIC!!


I see you Dondria!! But I need your own record to come out. Been waiting long enough.
Pleasure P ft. Dondria- Under --remix [<< clicketh.]

Wayne decided to give us more of what he's truly good at. Some good ol' freestyles. His mixtape No Ceilings has just come out, but I'll hold off on the downloading myself b/c I have a STRONG feeling I'll be disappointed. He needs to sharpen his flow up. I need those crafty, ingenious lines he came with on the Drought 3. But be the judge for yourself.
Lil' Wayne- No Ceilings mixtape [<< clicketh.]

Plies has a new one out. Production by Polow da Don, & Miss Keri baby on the hook.
Plies ft. Keri Hilson- Medicine [<< clicketh.]

Lupe's back!!
Lupe Fiasco- Turnt Up freestyle [<< clicketh.]

Timbo's working on the sequel to Shock Value.
Timbaland ft. Drake- Say Something [<< clicketh.]

I love how Ryan Leslie [who is truly talented] is bringing real music back. & by real music, I mean the feel and instrumentation. I'm so tired of these generic sounds. I wanna hear flutes, horns, piano keys, drums, harmonicas, cymbals, acoustic guitars. Something symphonic that makes me want to move as soon as I hear it.
Ryan Leslie- To the Top [<< clicketh.]

I was put on this by Claire like last month, but I'm listening to it now & I wanna "plug" it.
Consequence ft. Kanye West & John Legend- Whatever U Want [<< clicketh.]

--ridiculous REALiZATION.

I haven't bought a pair of sneakers since this year began!! Can you say in-sane?

-sigh- Why don't they make kicks like they used to?

thee End of a Chapter.

October, that is. I find it so insane how it's almost the end of the month when it feels like it just started. This happens everytime, though. Life is zooming by, whether or not you're in sync with it.


--on another note, I found this thing I wrote on my phone a whiiile back & I've been wanting to share it. No official title for whatever it is this is. Just "motorcycle."


    "You gotta trust me, bay," he spoke softly, barely above a whisper looking me square in my eyes. Hesitation so palpable in my air, I glanced down at his extended hand, an invitation for my hand to join, then back at the rest of his body that sat rigidly on his '87 coffee chrome Harley. He licked his lips and contorted his features into one of impatience and hurt.

I know he was probably thinking entrusting him with my life was something I haven't come to do but that wasn't the case. I was just...afraid. Afraid of actually coming to realize I trust him THAT much. The thought washed over my psyche like a wave, causing me to shiver. It earned a look of concern from him.

"Bay..." he started in a pleading tone, "come ride wit' me." Even if I had no ears to receive the sound waves he submitted with his mouth, I could simply look at him, into his olive brown eyes and conclude he was begging. I tried to stall for as long as I could by averting my attention to the traffic that flew by us from where we were stationed. The wind blew, increasing the cold temperature. I wrapped my jacket tighter around my torso before making up my mind. Taking one more look at the hand that held out to me, open and waiting to receive the heat of my palm that signified much more than accepting a ride on his bike, I brought my lips into my mouth. Shaking my head from left to right slowly, I took one step back.

His head flinched back slightly at the movement. He looked so hurt but I chose to overlook it 'cause I knew the deal. Letting out a shuddering sigh, I closed my eyes tightly as my hand searched through the night for his hand. Once my palm lay in his, he tightly clasped his hand around mine. I smiled through closed eyes.

"I love you," he said.

Finally opening my eyes, I replied "I love you, too."

...but I'm different;

I can't base what I'm gonna be off of what everybody isn't.




   If these words don't soak in, and embed themselves into my mind... I'm tired of this doubt that rises from the pit of my stomach whenever I think about the future. The fear that stems from within has me feeling so nauseous, has my eyebrows furrowing, has my body tense, has my mind going haywire in worry. Looking around, I see where everyone else has ended up and I feel like I'll be subjected to that mediocrity, but I don't want it. I don't want to feel this way. I want to KNOW that I'll be successful, and above all, I want to know that I'll be HAPPY in whatever it is I do. Sick and tired of these lame jobs I find myself at, wasting my time [something I can't EVER get back once it's gone], and super unhappy at. So over feeling like my career will be as unsatisfying as these jobs have been/ are. My field of interest is the Arts and I know my main hindrance is my fright. I'm so scared that I don't have what it takes to excel in this field. I need to break out of this shell and break out of the habit of feeling doubtful. I have what it takes, and I'm very much capable. Life and death are in the power of the tongue, so I shall speak goodness and success into my life.

10.19.09

   Sometimes I wonder why. Why GOD allows the things that do happen, to occur. I feel like I'm living in a fantasy world and that I should grow up, but is it wrong to really dream of and want a world of no tragedies, no evil, no bad? Is it wrong to not want the tears, the tear-jerking moments, the pain? I have a split perspective on this. While I feel that it doesn't/ shouldn't have to be this way, I question who I think I am for feeling this way. I have no say and I'm not even worthy of voicing my opinion. All I can do is pray and hope for better. Not just for my family, not just for myself, but for all the good people out there who are really going through it right now.

`nSPiRED.

Music plays such a huge role in my life, granted the power to affect me emotionally. Browsing around on Twitter, I stumbled upon a lovely young woman's Twitter page. Her name is Skye Townsend. She is VERY talented, and she's only 15...if that information is accurate. All in all, she's young and gifted. Her voice is rich for someone her age. Just wanted to shed some light upon her. If you ever decide to venture onto her Myspace page, here is the link. [Skye Townsend Myspace <<clicketh.] & check out her song "Miami." Good stuff. =]

early Sunday BOREDOM.

Real music. Raw talent.

TREY is C R A Z Y .

Gotta love it though. "LOL =]"

special gift for OCTOBER. *

In celebration of a new month [already?! Crazy!!], I shall be posting up a storm. Don't mind me. =]

truth.

maybe, if you gave me, I wouldn't have let him take me.

your COOL.

When you try, you can't. But when you don't, you are.

So just be.